{"id":660,"date":"2024-12-04T04:10:37","date_gmt":"2024-12-03T20:10:37","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/gen-e-sis.com\/blog\/2021\/02\/06\/do-not-evacuate-the-building-this-only-a-test\/"},"modified":"2026-03-19T17:20:20","modified_gmt":"2026-03-19T09:20:20","slug":"do-not-evacuate-the-building","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/handelbarweb.com\/blog\/do-not-evacuate-the-building\/","title":{"rendered":"Do not Evacuate the Building"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n
\"Digital
Mediocrity: the civilized superpower\u2014where guitars, warnings, and loneliness converge at 10AM.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\nSurreal Bureaucratic Satire<\/span>\n
\n

\n A surreal riff on missing cars, stolen goods, and spellcheck tyranny. This post explores mediocrity, semantics, and Scottish-accented warnings \u2014 where the Department of Lost Objects files complaints against the Ministry of Misplaced Meaning. Expect memos written in invisible ink, forms that self-destruct upon completion, and a stern voicemail from a Glaswegian AI reminding you that \u201ccompliance is a feeling, not a fact.\u201d\n <\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n

“Do not evacuate the building – this only a test”. That is what would come over the PA in the brown building in East Perth in a Scottish accent around ten am on Wednesdays or thereabouts.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So my car went missing today – I parked it on Sunday in the usual spot – have done for three months – but it’s not there now. They say you don’t know what you’ve got til its gone – well they said the world was flat – but no, I don’t miss it (yet) it was an exercise in parking ain’t free (I should [not] point out that the spell checker forced me to include an apostrophe in a number of places) and just in case you think I’m less than two cents in the dollar the consensus (it looks like I spelled that right) of the mental health experts is that I’m ‘malingering’ as if there is a malingering bone in my skeletal frame. But let us not get hung up in semantics.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So no – I don’t miss the car – but there were stolen goods in the boot – well when I say stolen I mean that if the car was stolen then there is a follow-on effect to the goods thus inscribed. In particular, a guitar and an amp, and a socket set that survived Sherlock River (but that’s another story). So to cut a long story short, mediocrity. If you can be mediocre you can succeed in a civilized version of life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So ‘Do not evacuate the building – This only a test’.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

p.s. I also had to capitalize (with z’s) a lot of proper nouns to satisfy the spell checker – Language, who needs it? And people still go hungry! Wtf! Someone has outwitted themselves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n